Thursday, March 6, 2014

Miss M's Conundrum

We all know Miss M is a diva.
Oftentimes, it feels like this is Miss M's world and we just live in it.
To this truth, she proposes challenges and it is up to us to rise up and accept those challenges.
The current conundrum that she poses should be known as the Urine-try Conundrum. Miss M is very particular about her urination in terms of who may see, what may happen, where it will happen and when it will happen.
Miss M enjoys roaming around her kingdom when her servants are present and even more so when they are away gathering funds to support her extravagant lifestyle.
While roaming her kingdom, she enjoys the finer things in life: laying in supabed, laying on her pillow: Mr. B, scrounging for crumbs and urinating wherever she pleases (but only under specific circumstances).
If her servants leave by a certain time, then it is the perfect opportunity to urinate around her kingdom.
If her servants leave later, then she cannot grace the carpet garden, even if her servants are away several hours longer than usual.
On her afternoon and evening diva walks, she cannot perform her business if a stranger is around. In addition, she must be able to find a corner of grass or hide behind a tree to complete her business.
To make it more interesting, she will not perform her business if she can see that her servant is observing her do her business. If any of these conditions are not to her liking, she will choose to head back into her kingdom, because at night when her servants and pillow are asleep, it is the perfect time to skip to her loo.



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10 comments:

m @ random musings said...

wow! this post certainly makes me grateful that our 10yo adopted lab mix has only had one accident (when he was sick, poor boy) since joining the household. knock wood.

What are your favorite cleaning products for getting odors out/preventing stains? Do you ever find evidence when spots are no longer, ahem, fresh? If so, is a different cleaning approach warranted?

Rachel said...

oh Ms M! While her servants are gathering funds to support her lifestyle haha oh man.

Debra@Peaceabull said...

Oh! LOL!

adventuresofadogmom said...

Oh Miss M... you are indeed a princess!

OG said...

My dog Precious, after whom Petey is named, was a JAP beyond all JAPs, for the first year I had her she had to pee on grass, and so we went to the islands in the middle of Park Avenue. If it was raining/snowing/noisy/the stars were not aligned she wouldn't go AT ALL! Inside or outside. Once it snowed and the Christmas trees were illuminated on Park Ave and I didn't want us to get electrocuted she did not pee or poop for 72 hours! Neither inside or outside!

ohmelvin.com said...

Miss M's conundrum-doppelganger's name is Jake. Too cold outside? Pee inside. Not enough time in the day to poop outside? Poop while your eating. He is 100% house-trained, will go on an hour walk and never go once until we let him into the backyard and even then, sometimes will walk inside and pee. And he's so flippen sneaky about it sometimes that we had to buy a black light flashlight so I could make sure I found all spots! Let me very clear about my reading of this post - MISERY LOVES COMPANY!!!

Cocos Mommy said...

When we were on our honeymoon, we had Cousin Madam and her mommy over to watch Coco and she got off her routine and accidentally went potty inside. I can just imagine her embarrassment.

2 Punk Dogs said...

Oh no, Miss M! Wonder if she would use pee pads in the privacy of her kingdom?
Our Miss Maggie decided that she would hold it all day when the temps were in single digits - she did nothing on lunchtime walks. She prefers to hold it until night walks when she can mark the perimeter of other dogs' yards.

monica irwin said...

so funny - Miss M. is such a doll!

Laura and Hans said...

Skip to her loo... That is just too funny.
Poor Miss M, thank god she's not a cat and her little issue should hopefully just be an inconvenience and not a huge problem. But, Wilbur totally feels her pain; he can only do his business along a fence or hedge line and his back has to be to his audience. On the boat, he once again has his back to us and when he's done he leaves the scene as quickly as possible.

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